This is what I journaled last night. Some simple thoughts for a very complicated time. Nothing too extraordinary to say. Sorry if some points are unclear, I just needed to let out what was on my mind.
I am really scared for the world at this moment. It all seems to be getting worse, and only the bad is broadcasted. There is COVID, there is inequality, there is unnecessary death by those meant to protect, there is looting, there is rioting. Every time we thought we've reached the threshold, it becomes greater. At any moment, we can crack. I wonder what the meaning is, I wonder when the reward of peace will come to fruition, because right now, it seems too far to bare. There is so much unfairness that it seems too far gone to fix and too much to heal from. Everyone seems to be an enemy of another, and I hate it. Please, God, allow us to look in retrospect and see the reasons for the pain, instead of just experiencing it. Your people need a miracle. I do not want to waste time with intellectual opinions, poetic writing, or complicating the fact that what is happening is wrong. I watch movies and shows and it seems like a separate entity from life now, and I am not even the one actively suffering. But simultaneously, when one of us suffers, we all do. I do not want us to suffer anymore, but at this moment, it seems like that is too much to ask.
I know this doesn't end on a "happy" note, but the situation right now isn't happy. However, this will hopefully be a beginning to change. I do believe humanity will achieve what we all desire one day. Even if it is in the deepest depths of the souls of certain individuals. We will achieve love.
